Monday, February 08, 2010
This is a filler blog.
Which means that it has no real purpose and I'm only writing it because I have nothing to do while I wait for my mum to take me to the station. Where I will do all sorts of things with mandy kwan and sisi ji.
or rather, they will drug me and do all sorts of things to me.
I wish I didn't sound so excited.
But I guess I cannot hide my true nature.
Okay my mother is ready. Omg, I think I may actually be early for once. An excellent start to the year!
Will blog later. About who knows what. In case I don't, all I want to say is
WELCOME TO HONG KONG RONALD.
SHOP HARD. STIMULATE THE HK ECONOMY. BE A GOOD CITIZEN.
and come back soon. I need ugly people around me to make me feel good.
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
7:41 PM
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Okay. I was supposed to be clearing my desk (something I've been meanign to do since November)
but obviously i failed.
I was also supposed to be working on my resume because I'm dying to go work at Alannah Hill (i'm *this* close to going over there and begging them to hire me on the spot, for free). I think it's really sad when my ultimate fantasy is working at Alannah Hill and wearing their clothes at work for free.
It's almost as sad as Mandy's ambition to go eat at Pizza Hut buffet.
But sigh, I know it's impossible. Even if I did get in (with like NO retail experience whatsoever), there'd be no time. Freaking uni. It's destroying my short-term dreams :(.
Sigh.
But in an alternate universe where I didn't have to go to lectures about homeostasis and visit the elderly and ill, or if I didn't sell my soul to money and tutoring so that I could you know...afford clothing in the first place, I would be wearing pretty clothes for free.
I really miss Hong Kong and Taiwan :( I miss it there so much. All the shops, all the clothing. I miss seeing a Vivienne Westwood boutique every two steps and Jill Stuart and Liz Lisa. It's not the same, fantasising using the world wide web. It's like how porn is never as good as the real thing.
safoiahdsf;idhsf;dgdnbakl;ba :( :( :(
emo.
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
8:14 PM
Okay, I know that I start every blog with "OMG I NEED SLEEP" but this is like true. Because I'm so tired, I'm finding smudged eyeliner in the strangest places and my head hurts. I'm also listening to "Fall for you" on repeat because Ronald Ho got it stuck in my head with his piano rendition of it.
It was quite good actually. I reluctantly admit.
Finally saw my darling Cindy Wang for first time since she got back a few days ago. I mean, we had sustained an LDR (long distance relationship with phone calls and email and msn) but I was reminded today that sex in real life is better than any virtual alternative.
By sex, I mean = spending an outrageous amount on food and going window shopping and talking about what to buy for each other, to make up for next year where we decided to be Stooges and not get each other any presents. So we shopped at Peter Alexander and Alannah Hill and we were going to get each other fluffy Chanel-inspired colourful bags (for only $30!!!) but then as fate ordained it, there was this utterly ... chat girl carrying the same bag and I don't know, my erection wilted instantaneously. Oh how I've missed dissecting other people's appearances with somebody possibly more vicious than me :)
But baby, we're going to go High Tea next week! DON'T LOSE YOUR HIGH TEA VIRGINITY TO ANYBODY ELSE BUT ME OK? omg i swear, I got a heart attack when you said that you were going high tea with somebody else.
good moments
e.g.
CINDY: I swear I got flabbier after I came back from HK.
ME: mmm not really.
CINDY: WHY DID YOU PAUSE? I"M FLABBIER ARENT I? ARENT I? ARENT I?
ME: ... OKAY FINE. YOU DID. YOU"RE SO FLABBY that when you move, your fat fucking jiggles and the jellyfish get jealous.
CINDY: *huff huff. storms down George St*
ME: baby come back. I take it back. Don't be this way. The jellyfish don't know anything.
Hmmm... other things worthy of note.
Date with Ron and Pat yday :). 'twas good indeedy. We sang emotional songs and snacked on meat pies as we played dress ups. Ronald was very tempted to put on a dress. but he would not because he said that I would post pictures of him up on facebook and he would undergo public humiliation.
Pffft. Why does nobody have any faith in me? Screw you, bitches.
I also promised to blog about Vyanh's tennis party. And I suffer from short term loss :( So don't be hating.
'nough said.
and Haroldish is back from the Nippon! :)
he made me jealous because he told me details about his exploits and how he got his hair cut by a "hot male hairdresser
ME: How were the jap chicks?
HAROLD: ABSOLUTELY AMAZINNNNNNGGGGG. A-M-Z-A...oops.
AND ANGE IS BACK TOO. WELCOME BACK MY SEXIEZ.
and harold's being a bitch.
HAROLD: i got all this free Calvin Klein stuff cause my cousin works there.
ME: REALLY? Couldnt you have gotten him to get me free CK underwear? Size S
HAROLD: REALLY? AS IF!
ME: OMFG. FUCK YOU
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
4:18 AM
Saturday, January 30, 2010
my stupid phone has died again. The white screen of death that I have come to fear and dread appeared. FAR OUT. STUPID STUPID STUPID TECHNOLOGY. Why do you freeze on me? Why do you treat me this way?
I rage.
I simmer in my impotent rage.
I've now lost my trust in touch technology. I'm like one of those bitter old women with a thousand cats who've lost faith in the male sex, only I'm talking about the Omnia Samsung. Do not get it. I hate it. It may look good from far away but it has frozen on me like 5 times. I swear, the 'reset' button is like...worn out. Plus it uses up battery like whooaaa. Stupid mobile. You deserve to be stamped on. Fuck you, two year contract. I'm so angry.
Hmmm went out last night for first time to Flow Fridays aka Equilibrium. It was quite exciting cause I'd never been there before.
It turned out to be darker than Bamboo - I put my hand in front of me and couldn't see any fingers.
It turned out to be louder than Space - I now have punctured eardrums from people screaming into them all night long.
It turned out to have uglier people than ... Pontoon - no wait, that's not really possible, is it? Yeah, okay, admitting that I've been to Pontoon is a really shameful thing and if people ever ask me, I will deny all knowledge. Pontoon? Never heard of it!
But seriously. It was like amazing. They honestly got the ugliest people in Sydney and put them into one little room.
Which doesn't say very much about me, I know but SERIOUSLY.
I saw a Buddhist monk. I bowed in deference to him.
There was a nice fellow in purple gyrating to the beat of the music. He was fat. Exactly my type of man.
In short, it was depressing.
But despite the severe lack of eye candy, it was still extremely fun being stupid. And nudging each other every time somebody who looked like they should be banned from public strolled past.
Chris found a man shorter than me. Whom I stood in front of so that the height difference could be further appreciated. Then seven short men marched past me and I was reminded sorely of Snow White and her Seven Dwarves.
Please remember that I am 160 cm on a good day.
It was truly amazing.
I think I'm losing my faith in humanity.
QUOTE OF THE NIGHT
*me pointing out some poor hideous girl*
CHRIS: ... You are so useless. I can find ugly girls for myself, thank you very much.
hmph talk about useless. He would not play 'DARE DARE" with me where we select ugly people for each other and you're dared to 'hit on' them. Wrong time to grow a sense of shame, if you ask me.
hahha still a good night out. I love Mizuya's. Chrissy and I feasted on crocodile. It was surprisingly delicious. Crocodiles of the oceans beware.
I will take Cindy Wang there once her bank account is outside the negative field. WELCOME BACK BABY!
houseparty at Vyanh's tomorrow! OMG. IM GOING CRAZY IMAGINING ALL THE FOOD SHE'S GOING TO COOK FOR US. I think it's worth it. Even though Mandy has told me that she will drink red wine and offer herself to me, I have calculated that if I leave after food, I can flee from her advances :)
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
5:36 AM
Sunday, January 24, 2010
This blog is dedicated to Cindy Wang.
Not because she's beautiful
Not because she's intelligent
not because she's particularly kind-hearted (because, really?)
and definitely not because she looks good naked (she really doesn't. I don't know why I know)
but because it's her birthday today.
Everybody knows the story of how I met the creepy Cindy Wang, the start of our beautiful blossoming and totally, totally non-lesbian relationship.
Yes, we've been through this. If I was a gay female, I would find a fellow HOT gay female to shack up with. Cindy Wang does not fulfill two of those criteria, even if she was a lesbian.
But enough about bagging her out.
Ma cherie, since it's your 20th birthday, I'm going to announce 20 reasons why I love you.
20) because we do stupid shit whenever we're together. Like testing the laxative effect of apple gum, when it first came out. Or listening to Paris Hilton songs in biology.
19) because you can read my mind. Great minds may or may not think alike. You can finish the end of my sentences.
18) because you say stupid things like: "i'm unique. I'm beautiful. I'm like a fucking unicorn" that make me laugh so hard. I get to use interesting metaphors in return.
17) because we have to talk at least once a day. Even if it is to chat about our very exciting lives.
(eg. ME: so what'd you do?
CINDY: i dunno. i just woke up and ate. you?
ME: meh. I'm eating dinner right now.
CINDY: weren't you eating dinner two hours ago?
ME: fuck you, i'm a growing girl)
16) because you know every single detail of my life. EVERY single detail and vice versa. You know every item in my wardrobe. I know everything in yours. You tell me your bowel habits. I comment and tell you to eat more fibre. I remind you when it's your relationship anniversary or when you have to call your mum.
15) because you know me so well and aren't above emotional blackmail. When you threaten to tell others embarrassing details about me unless I do your bidding.
14) because of our in-jokes. Our secret language. Somebody eavesdropping on us wouldn't understand what we're saying because we have so many code names.
13) because my stuff is your stuff. I have had your penguin joke book for five years. And it's really growing on me. I have no desire to return it.
12) because you give really good advice. Stuff like: "don't go to Pontoon". And then when I go to Pontoon and come back bitching about it, you have the grace to not say "I TOLD YOU SO. WHO TOLD YOU NOT TO GO? WHO WENT? ARE YOU GOING TO GO NEXT TIME?" immediately.
11) because you listen nicely. You let me rant when i'm being a freaking bitch. You hate the people I hate. You understand when I talk about the fat bitch on the train.
10) because you're my support. if i ever got into a fistfight, i know that you'd be standing right behind me, flapping your arms and being very useless but more importantly, being there in first place.
9) because we always try out new things together. The first time we went clubbing. The first time we went drinking. The first time we did anything. First time we joined facebook LOL. everytime I see a new restaurant, I think to myself: "how nice. I'm gonna take cindy wang there")
8) because whenever i'm sad, you're the first person I think of turning to. You're my speed dial, literally. You make me laugh afterwards, I forget why I was sad in the first place.
7) because whenever something exciting or funny happens, I immediately think of telling you. Because I know that you of all people would appreciate it as well.
6) because of the good memories. In high school, you were my lifeline. Without you, I wouldn't have jigged classes. All those rainy days eating jap food at Carlo village, doing the usual stuff like buying gay porn, bitching about other peple and asking the chef to fry our sashimi.
5) because we've been through a lot. we have argued, we have fought, we have silent treatment. I was really really bothered when we stopped talking during that time in year 12. I came home and said to my mum: "FUCK CINDY WANG" and locked myself in my room. And everytime we sat next to each other in bio and didn't talk, i felt horrible. And everytime you didn't turn up at school, I felt pissed off but didn't say anything. Then we had that conversation right before the trials and I cried because you stopped being stubborn first and told me that you missed me first. Since then, we deal with our arguments the mature way.
4) because you understand me so well. We think alike, you and I. Talking to you is so easy.
3) because you are loyal to me and me to you. You know that I am always on your side and vice versa. It's some kind of weird creepy bond, but I do treasure it a lot.
2) because we're completely honest with each other. Common social decency does not matter with us. If your hair looks crap, I will tell you. If you hate the way I chew, you will tell me. I may bash the shit out of you, but at the end of the day, I know that I can trust you.
1) because you're my best friend.
so happy birthday. And when you get back, we can celebrate your birthday with high tea, food and weight gain.
I miss you.
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
3:01 AM
Thursday, January 21, 2010
i'm blogging here because i don't want to reflect in my fucking portfolio
fuck fuck fuck fuck
and i won't be doing any work tomorrow because BIG DAY OUT YES and FUCK YES, MUSE.
and i won't be doing any work sunday because.... you're not supposed to do work on sunday.
right?
right?
which leaves monday and tuesday
fuck fuck fuck.
oh well.
I will survive. Somehow.
ARGH SO FREAKING TIRED. LACK OF SLEEP DOES THAT TO YOU. THE FONT BEFORE MY EYES IS SWIMMING.
I'm so tired, I have no more fucking thoughts. I am incoherent.
Have arrived back in Australia and have settled back in the swim of things.
Have recaptured job back, fulfilling my life long ambition to teach young minds and more importantly, earn petty cash so I can fill the void in my soul with overpriced clothing.
have explored all the shops in Sydney and have purchased more things than needed because sales are not meant to be resisted
have cut down on the going out because going out every single day leads to nasty consequences like immense sleep deprivation, money shortage and weight gain.
so yes
fucking portfolio, it's making me lose hair.
and IM GOING TO SEE MUSE TOMORROW. MATT BELLAMY AND HIS BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL VOICE OMG. I AM SO EXCITED, I CANT EVEN TURN OFF MY CAPSLOCK BUTTON.
this is a disappointing blog. I'm sorry. I can't type when i'm ... excited.
following that train of thought, I can't work on portfolio either. I cbf :)
whatevs. I'll just work on this on Australia Day.
hahahah quotes to die for
*watching a video of Britney Spears shaking it in I love RocknRoll at karaoke*
ME: WOAH. She was really hot back then.
MANDY (contemplating seriously): yes... I do look like that sometimes.... I look like that now, I think.
ME & SISI: ..................
MANDY: what? *actually surprised*
HAHAH WHAT A LOSER.
Things that will never ever ever ever get old
fire chicken, bad karaoke, singing emo songs, butchering emo songs, 2 am long phone calls, bitching about other people, criticising other people's looks, mahjong, drinking in the afternoon, 3D movies, sales shopping, laughing about the most random shit, self-satisfaction at catching the last train home (BEAT THAT CITYRAIL, SUCK MY WELL-ENDOWED SEX ORGAN) and like, friends. Yeah, that.
I guess they're the things that you live for lolz.
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
10:49 PM
Thursday, January 07, 2010
Last post in Taiwan and first post of 2010.
W00000000t.
So I leave Kaohsiung tomorrow. For some touring of Taipei before I jet right back to Sydney. I shall indeed miss Taiwan :( I mean, I've stayed here for over a month and this place has really grown on me.
I will definitely miss the shopping (because seriously like omfg, nothing beats the shopping here. It was even better than HK). The good food. Not worrying whether shops are going to close at night. The streets being busier at 11 pm than at 11 am. The MTR system (seriously, so much more efficient than trains). And like relatives and stuff.
Back to Sydney, where I have to worry about finally finally getting my freaking P's and losing weight (there is quite a lot to lose unfortunately) and money (because my finances are quite low) and starting on my stupid reflective portfolio due on jan 27. Diu.
but LOL must mention my bitchy neighbour. I think I have severe neighbour issues where I never get along with them.
Some of you may have heard me complain about my neighbour back in Australia. About good old Rod and his dognapping ways. I say 'dognapping' because I swear, he stole my dog Isabel. If that wasn't bad enough, Rod also stole some of my parent's land. How does one steal land you might ask? Well, you can steal land when you're replacing the fence. My dad left my mum in charge of overseeing Rod replacing the fence. This was obviously unwise because my mum left halfway to go ...shopping and when she came back, Rod had finished and had conveniently placed the fence closer to our house. My dad discovered this after he compared before and after pictures and in the aftershot, a shrub which had been on our side, was now on the dark side.
Needless to say, Rod is not a family friend.
Well in Taiwan, I don't know who our neighbour is. But I do know that it's a woman. And I say that she is a bitch. Like the other day, I got bored of watching Dark Knight on tv and started learning how to play Marriage d'Amour on the piano. In my defence I was really rusty and like I was never that coordinated in the first place. Either way, I was crap (admittedly) and like, I knew it... ok. But to rub it in, my stupid neighbour started playing it perfectly next door. Many times.
:@
sigh, okay, I'm going to prove that bitch wrong and finally finish learning it ><
next time, i type here, it will be in Australia! xD
my sympathies go to Cindy Wang who is now in Shanghai. HAHAHAHAH FACEBOOK IS BANNED IN CHINA LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO. Is there a way you can come back to HK early? I actually do feel bad for you.
ngawww excerpt from her email which made me feel much loved
" i actually do miss u. but ur still a bitch. and the first thing i do back in sydney is buy you those stupid underwears. well maybe not the first thing. but i will. dw."
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
1:20 AM
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Happy New Year everybody! :)
Counting down the days till I'm back.
... okay, I sign in onto MSN for the first time in like...a fortnight, and the first thing i get is some weirdo talking to me in Chinese. I'm very proud that my Chinese has improved so much here that I can understand 75% of what he's saying.
This is freaking awesome. I'm becoming really bilingual :D. Of course the freak thinks that I'm his friend's older sister but that's not the point. Oh, he just asked my name.
YOU IDIOT. YOU KNOW MY FREAKING EMAIL AND YOU HAVE TO ASK MY NAME?
Not really much to say here but I want to wish you all a very happy new year and hope that you guys all had a really good christmas. I did. For the first time, I wasn't sick :)
Last post of 2009!
and let's see how 2009 was.
Right before I left Sydney, my fellow fatkateers => Fat Man (aka mandycmkwan) and Fat Choy (aka Sisi to the Jiji) summarised our year. General consensus was: "It sucked".
Looking back, yeah, some parts of it sucked beyond comparison but not all of it was bad.
I'm happy that I got to know some of my friends better. That I got to be closer to a lot of them. So I'm very happy about that and I sound so freaking gay, I sound like Sisi Ji after she's had a lot to eat. But I'm glad that I got to spend more time with you guys. xoxo x10000000
I'm glad that I don't suck that much at uni and now I don't need to lie about my WAM to my parents anymore. Lying about one's marks is really hard work you know. Seriously. The effort taken to conceal one's marks from one's parents > the effort to actually study/cram the night before.
I'm really grateful that this year, everybody I love have been safe from any sort of physical bodily harm.
So really, I did enjoy 2009.
- I found out who my real friends were (that's right, that's friends PLURAL)
- I did okay in uni with my 79.something D average (it rounds up right? right?)
- I shopped a lot (seriously, Australian economy and now Taiwan economy is lucky to have me)
- I lost weight with my awesome food poisoning (and gained it all back plus some more, yeah...fuck)
- I got to hang out with my favourite friends a lot (you know who you are, oh shameless ones ^^)
- I had a lot of fun. From clubbing, drunken K and silly drinking games at 4am and nice quiet church time with family, friends and God the next morning... all of it was fun xD (tiring though)
most importantly, I got over everything.
I'm no longer sad about how things ended. I'm happy with what we had and if I had to do it again, I would do the same. Sometimes I still replay the events that led to the very end and in the past, I'd wonder whether I could have been a better person about it, whether I could have changed it. Now I've stopped thinking of it because I know that it was inevitable and for the better. We both deserve to be happy and even though, we would have been had we still been together, it isn't worth it. I rather be 100% happy than 60%.
I'm no longer angry nor do I hate anybody anymore. None of that shit matters, i've realised. My whole life, I've never been so cruel to a single person. To be fair, I've never hated a single person so much. I did hate her, I hated her for reasons that don't matter anymore and because hating her was so easy. It's so much easier to hate when you're angry and when it hurts. I feel a little bad for being so cutting and so cruel (no other word to describe it) but I don't regret it because I needed it that time. It was a necessary evil, it's like a bridge you need to cross over the river.
But it's over. I read on a car sign the other day that forgiving others is actually a kindness to yourself. And I agree. Because right now, I'm genuinely quite happy.
So here's to 2010 - the year of the tiger!!~~~~ So excited about this year and what it's going to be bring. I promise to be a better person (or at least...try), to appreciate my friends and family a bit more, to be nicer to myself (because self pity is NOT hot) and to not take uni for granted (because contrary to what I complain about most of the time, I do enjoy my course, I do like what I'm learning).
Happy new year everybody.
<3
Right now I'm going to go downstairs and help myself to a salted egg (they are so freaking delicious) before the family goes off to Love River to watch the NYE fireworks.
See you all in 2010!!
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
11:01 PM
